A True Story of: Susan. It was a abusive relationship?

"I felt suicidal, I was ashamed that this was happening to me and I was allowing the abuse to continue with my children in the house."

For most of the victims, it is very difficult to recognize when a pattern of abuse has developed in their relationship. Instead, they often see abusive behaviors as isolated, unrelated incidents. Yet, abuse often happens in cycles, with abusive episodes interspersed with periods of calm, loving support, and affirmation — nurturing and caring that initially drew the two partners together. However, the element of abusive pattern that develops can often become predictable and a source of tension, even during periods of calm.

''Since the abuse takes place behind closed doors, it is often denied by the victims themselves.''

A True Story of: Susan. It was a abusive relationship?

Susan was just 18 when she first met and fell in love with Ulner, a 26-year-old man she saw on stage.

Ulner was a bass guitarist in a popular local band, while Susan had just finished her first year of college.

They started dating immediately. Eventually, they got married and started a family, with Susan working at a health-insurance company.

At first, Ulner was just controlling, not so different from her own father. But, the more she complied, the more he demanded.

"The controlling (Controlling behaviours) was absolutely there from the beginning. … Without me recognizing it," Susan said.

The physical abuse started more than 10 years into the marriage, when, according to Susan, she forgot an item at a nearby grocery store.

"He hurt me," Susan said. "He hurt me badly. I just couldn't believe it. It's like you're almost outside your body watching and saying, 'This can't be happening.'"

Susan said that Ulner cut her off from her father and her family for many years, leaving her isolated with no one to talk to, and completely under his control.

Susan Goes Back to Work

In 2002, the family started struggling financially, and Susan returned to work at a new job.

The only escape she had from her controlling and abusive home life was her new friend and boss, Lynne Jasper. read more

Story Source: http://abcnews.go.com/2020

Domestic abuse happens in all social groups. Whilst it might be aggravated by stress, unemployment, poverty, alcohol or mental illness – it is not caused by it. And no woman ever deserves it.

Thousands of women they a too afraid or too ashamed to tell anyone what is going on at home. They go about their daily lives as though nothing untoward is happening, and the abuse continues

I asking you to have patience and compassion for victims of domestic violence. It is important to realize women stay with abusers for many reasons. Judging and placing blame on victims only drives them farther into silence. Please remember, leaving an abuser is not a decision, it’s a process. Stick it out, be supportive of your friend, family member or coworker. You may be their Only Hope.

Remember together we have the power to make a difference...

So spread the word, break the silence. Don't wait for tomorrow, May someone need you right now 'Spread it now......


Lucy said...

Hey, Petercrys! This is a very noble site you have going on here. I'm sure you're spreading awareness and helping out a great many women.

I try to help people out in a different means. I'm a standup comedienne blogging her way to stardom. I would love it if you stopped by and left an insightful comment---relevant comments from new blogger buddies are always appreciated.

Thanks again! And keep doing what you're doing! Because clearly you're great at it.

Quest for Comedic Stardom

Junelle said...

I hope we'll all learn "true love"

Anonymous said...

This woman sounds like a very brilliant career woman with a good education and a college degree. Even her husband was the same as well. Just because she failed to listen to her husband, doesn't mean he should hit her to get her to do so. He should forgive her instead. She's not a child here. She's an adult.

Anyway, the worst cause of DV is when a woman is having an affair with one or multiple men, admiring other men, especially in pornography, flirting with, talking with, or sexting other men, or molesting the children, etc. A lot of women have been beaten and/or killed for this and it's all about restricting a woman's sexual desires and her sexuality.