My Quest My Identity? Empowering Woman

Cycle of Violence and abusive relationship ?

2007-09-22T14:37:00.000+05:30

"I kept on staying with him because I thought all marriages required the wife to suffer, I did not know I deserved better."

Might you don't know but mostly Domestic violence always follows a pattern that is described as the cycle of abuse or cycle of violence. It is a pattern of living in which one person (usually the man) uses violence or other abusive behavior to control and maintain power over a partner, or other family member. It may include verbal abuse, psychological abuse, economic abuse, physical abuse and sexual abuse. The impact of continued abuse in a relationships is devastating, It low down the self-esteem and quality of life of victims and their children.

Domestic violence is part of a continuing cycle that's very difficult to break. if you're in an abusive relationship, you may recognize this pattern:

"He would bring me flowers and gifts the very next day after beating' me... I used to love the day after until things were getting worse and worse." He would say he was sorry and promise to change, but then about one month later he would go right back to kicking and punching. He even grabbed my throat once!"

THE CYCLE OF VIOLENCE:

Forms of Domestic Violence Click Here

The first part known as the “tension building”. During this stage, the batterer becomes edgy, irritable or impatient. The victim senses the batterer’s increasing tension, knowing he’s getting ready to explode. She walks on eggshells, being careful of what she says and how she acts. She may start hiding things which can be used as a weapon. The victim’s attempts to alleviate the tension are futile, and the tension explodes into violence.

The second part known as the “Violent Episode” . It is the shortest but most intense period. The batterer explodes and the victim is abused. The batterer may make unreasonable demands upon the victim. He may yell at the victim for hours, destroy something that has special meaning to her, or give out severe physical punishment. The physical abuse can range from pushing, slapping and punching to torture, rape and murder.

The third period known as the “Absence of Violence or Honeymoon Phase”. During this time, the defendant is kind, thoughtful, charming, and remorseful. He may tell the victim that he is sorry, that he loves her, and that he will never act that way again. He may bring her flowers or buy her an expensive gift. He may also minimize the violence and place the blame on the victim for causing the violence. After a period of time, the cycle begins again.

This is what makes domestic violence so confusing. I can't count how many times a survivor has told me, ("But sometimes he's so sweet! And he's not a monster! We've had some good times too! I loved him - I still do really. He put me in hospital twice but I just melted when I saw him crying. I thought hitting me showed he cared. I believed him when he said he would change.")

Domestic violence increases in frequency and severity. It is never an isolated incident or a one-time occurrence.

"Read this small Story of a girl name Margie"

This is a painful one for Shirley and her husband Larry their daughter Margie was brutally murdered by the man who claimed to love her, Margie’s husband. “It’s easy to look back now and see the warning signs,” states Shirley. “But back then our family did not realize that the verbal attacks were escalating into physical assaults until it was too late.

I ask you to have patience and compassion for victims of domestic violence. It is important to realize women stay with abusers for many reasons. Judging and placing blame on victims only drives them farther into silence. Please remember, leaving an abuser is not a decision, it’s a process. Stick it out, be supportive of your friend, family member or coworker. You may be their Only Hope.”

Remember together we have the power to make a difference...

So spread the word. Don't wait for tomorrow, May someone need you right now 'Spread it now......

These are some of the common things most abusers say

2007-09-13T13:42:00.000+05:30

"Many women do not realise that their partners are abusive. At the beginning of a relationship the man is charming and only becomes abusive once the woman has

committed to the relationship"

The batterer always blames the Victim for causing the violence.

One of the Strange things about abuser's is that most of them, "presumably without ever talking to one another - say exactly the same things to their partners.

The Victim shoud understand the hurtful and abusive things there partner may say, are not true. most likely they are only attempts to avoid responsibility or are said to make it difficult for victim to leave.

These are some of common things abusers say:

You're so stupid / Worthless / Ugly / Fat.

You don't even know how keep the house in a decent state / you're a bad mother and hopeless cook / frigid / bitch/ whore / no-one else would want you, you're lucky to have me. (He means: I'm the victim here.)

If you tell anyone else about the abuse... you'll be sorry / no-one will believe you / I'll report you to social services as an unfit mother. "You don't know who you're up against.(He means: I'll have the last word.)

If you try or leave me. You will never get away / you couldn't cope without me / no-one else will have you / I'll snatch the kids and you'll never see them again / I'll track you down and find you even if it takes years and then I'll kill you so you'll never be able to live in peace never knowing when it will happen. (He means: I'll win, no matter what it takes.)
If you leave me I'll kill myself and you'll have to explain to our children why their dad is dead and it'll be on your conscience for the rest of your life. (Emotional blackmail)

" I remember just like its Yesterday, "I have had glasses thrown at me. I have been kicked in the abdomen when I was visibly pregnant. I have been kicked off the bed and hit while laying on the floor -- while I was pregnant. I have been punched and kicked in the head, chest, face and abdomen on numerous occasions."

Often the reason is precisely that - the cumulative effect of repeated physical and psychological trauma destroys confidence and self-belief.

I am asking you to have patience and compassion for victims of domestic violence. It is important to realize women stay with abusers for many reasons. Judging and placing blame on victims only drives them farther into silence. Please remember, leaving an abuser is not a decision, it’s a process. Stick it out, be supportive of your friend, family member or coworker. You may be their Only Hope.”

"I got the power to live my life. It was a very tough decision, but I am happy because a lot of women have spoken out and are standing up for themselves. It wasn't an easy decision, but it has done a lot of good."

I don't feel like I'm a hero," Rania says. "… I feel that no woman should be a victim to her husband, or a victim in anyway. A woman should have the ability to choose her own destiny."

Remember together we have the power to make a difference...

So spread the word, break the silence. Don't wait for tomorrow, May someone need you now......

A True Story of: Susan. It was a abusive relationship?

2007-09-06T16:35:00.000+05:30

"I felt suicidal, I was ashamed that this was happening to me and I was allowing the abuse to continue with my children in the house."

For most of the victims, it is very difficult to recognize when a pattern of abuse has developed in their relationship. Instead, they often see abusive behaviors as isolated, unrelated incidents. Yet, abuse often happens in cycles, with abusive episodes interspersed with periods of calm, loving support, and affirmation — nurturing and caring that initially drew the two partners together. However, the element of abusive pattern that develops can often become predictable and a source of tension, even during periods of calm.

''Since the abuse takes place behind closed doors, it is often denied by the victims themselves.''

A True Story of: Susan. It was a abusive relationship?

Susan was just 18 when she first met and fell in love with Ulner, a 26-year-old man she saw on stage.

Ulner was a bass guitarist in a popular local band, while Susan had just finished her first year of college.

They started dating immediately. Eventually, they got married and started a family, with Susan working at a health-insurance company.

At first, Ulner was just controlling, not so different from her own father. But, the more she complied, the more he demanded.

"The controlling (Controlling behaviours) was absolutely there from the beginning. … Without me recognizing it," Susan said.

The physical abuse started more than 10 years into the marriage, when, according to Susan, she forgot an item at a nearby grocery store.

"He hurt me," Susan said. "He hurt me badly. I just couldn't believe it. It's like you're almost outside your body watching and saying, 'This can't be happening.'"

Susan said that Ulner cut her off from her father and her family for many years, leaving her isolated with no one to talk to, and completely under his control.

Susan Goes Back to Work

In 2002, the family started struggling financially, and Susan returned to work at a new job.

The only escape she had from her controlling and abusive home life was her new friend and boss, Lynne Jasper. read more

Story Source: http://abcnews.go.com/2020

Domestic abuse happens in all social groups. Whilst it might be aggravated by stress, unemployment, poverty, alcohol or mental illness – it is not caused by it. And no woman ever deserves it.

Thousands of women they a too afraid or too ashamed to tell anyone what is going on at home. They go about their daily lives as though nothing untoward is happening, and the abuse continues

I asking you to have patience and compassion for victims of domestic violence. It is important to realize women stay with abusers for many reasons. Judging and placing blame on victims only drives them farther into silence. Please remember, leaving an abuser is not a decision, it’s a process. Stick it out, be supportive of your friend, family member or coworker. You may be their Only Hope.”

Remember together we have the power to make a difference...

So spread the word, break the silence. Don't wait for tomorrow, May someone need you right now 'Spread it now......

Why can't women leave abusive relationships?

2007-08-31T14:03:00.001+05:30

It is well documented that women who experience domestic violence can find it difficult to leave a violent relationship. The prospect of asking for help can be daunting for a woman who is feeling isolated, and whose self-esteem has been lowered by abuse.

"He turned everyone against me. I had no friends, no social life, no support. He got the children to keep track of my movements and tell him what I'd been doing and who I'd talked to. I knew he'd never let me go."

Leaving a relationship, no matter how abusive, is never easy. Women who leave relationships often have to opt for living in poverty. That's a very difficult choice to make. There are many social, cultural factors that contribute to encouraging women to stay and try and make the situation work. Often, violence is a familiar pattern for the woman, as well as the man. In addition, women often love the men who abuse them, or at least love them initially. Men who batter are not 100 percent hateful, but they can be loving and attentive partners at times. Some women remain emotionally and/or economically dependent on the batterer despite the fact that she faces continued abuse if she stays with him. Women are at highest risk of injury or violence when they are separating from or divorcing a partner. Women can be very intimidated by a partner and the consequences of her leaving. It takes a long time for a woman to give up hope in a relationship and to recognize that the only way she can be safe is to leave him.

"My mother, his mother, our counsellor and our minister all told me I should stay... They said he was trying to change and I needed to support him. I waited through six years of hell."

The impact of continued abuse on woman in intimate relationships is devastating.

I asked you before and i am asking you again to have patience and compassion for victims of domestic violence. It is important to realize women stay with abusers for many reasons. Judging and placing blame on victims only drives them farther into silence. Please remember, leaving an abuser is not a decision, it’s a process. Stick it out, be supportive of your friend, family member or coworker. You may be their Only Hope.”

Remember together we have the power to make a difference...

So spread the word. Don't wait for tomorrow, May someone need you right now 'Spread it now......

A Comment:

Thank-you for your work raising awareness about domestic abuse. The information you offer is life saving. I was in an abusive relationship--my ex controlled all the money. I could not earn money by getting a job because my ex refused to watch the children, which meant all my pay would go to daycare. He was also very abusive towards the children. In order to leave, I had to go on public assistance and even live in my car. It was very difficult to leave because my ex was stalking me--and friends were afraid to take me in. I was in such a bad place, emotionally, that I would not consider going to a shelter. I could not accept that I was abused. I assumed it was my fault that my life was falling apart, I believed all the insults and names screamed at me over the years. My advise is to love yourself unconditionally. NO ONE deserves to be hurt, to be made to live in fear. Seek help because you are worth it. And if you have kids, you can stop the cycle of violence.

Forms of Domestic Violence AGAINST Women

2007-08-24T15:53:00.000+05:30

"I loved him - I still do really. He put me in hospital twice but I just melted when I saw him crying. I thought hitting me showed he cared. I believed him when he said he would change."

Fear: Is the key factor in domestic violence and is often the most powerful way a perpetrator controls his victim. Fear is created by giving looks, or making gestures, possessing weapons destroying property, cruelty to pets or any behaviour which can be used to intimidate and render the victim powerless.

Intimidation: Includes destroying her possessions, smashing things, putting a fist through the wall, handling of guns or other weapons, using intimidating body language, hostile questioning of the victim, reckless driving of vehicle with victim in the car. It may include harassing the victim at her workplace either by making persistent phone calls or sending text messages or emails, following her to and from work, or loitering near her workplace.

Verbal abuse: Includes screaming, shouting, put-downs, name-calling, using sarcasm, ridiculing her for her religious beliefs or ethnic background.

Physical abuse: Can range from a lack of consideration for her physical comfort to causing permanent injury or even death. It could include such behaviour as pushing, hitting, choking, slapping, hair-pulling, punching etc. and may or may not involve the use of weapons. It could also be threats to, or actually destroying prized possessions.

Emotional abuse: Is a behaviour that deliberately undermines the confidence of victim, leading her to believe she is stupid, or that she is 'a bad mother' or useless or even to believe she is going crazy or is insane. This type of abuse humiliates, degrades and demeans the victim. The perpetrator may make threats to harm the victim, friend or family member, threaten to take her children, or to commit suicide. Or the perpetrator may use silence and withdrawal as a means to abuse.

Social abuse: Includes isolating the victim from social networks and supports either by preventing the victim from having contact with her family or friends or by verbally or physically abusing her in public or in front of others. It may be continually putting friends and family down so she is slowly disconnected from her support network.

Economic abuse: Results in the victim being financially dependent on their partner. She may be denied access to money, including her own, demanding that she and her children live on inadequate resources. These can be contributing factors for women becoming 'trapped' in violent relationships.

Sexual abuse: Includes a range of unwanted sexual behaviours including forced sexual contact, rape, forcing her to perform sexual acts that cause pain or humiliation, forcing her to have sex with others, causing injury to her sexual organs.

Controlling behaviours: Includes dictating what she does, who she sees and talks to, where she goes, keeping her from making any friends or from talking to her family, or having any money of her own. This can include preventing her from going to work, not allowing her to express her own feelings or thoughts, not allowing her any privacy, forcing her to go without food or water.

Spiritual abuse: Includes ridiculing or putting down her beliefs and culture, or preventing her from belonging to, or taking part in a group that is important to her spiritual beliefs, or practising her religion.

Separation violence: Often after the relationship has ended violence may continue, this can be a very dangerous time for the victim because the perpetrator may perceive a loss of control over the victim and may become more unpredictable. During and after seperation is often a time when violence will escalate leaving the victim more unsafe than previously.

Stalking: Sometimes the victim is stalked by the perpetrator either before or after separation. Stalking includes loitering around places she is known to frequent, watching her, following her, making persistent telephone calls and sending mail including unwanted love letters, cards and gifts although the relationship has ended. Stalking is a criminal offence, under the stalking legislation more than one type of behaviour has to occur, or the same type of behaviour has to occur on more than one occasion.

For me all forms of Domestic Violence are unacceptable some forms are a Criminal Offence.

"For years he had me believing it was my fault. He made me think I was stupid and ugly and I deserved what I got.. I was scared.. I could never manage without him and no-one would ever want me or give me a job."

The impact of continued abuse in intimate relationships can be devastating. Women escaping these horrific circumstances can often be heard to say, "but he loves me it’s my fault. I keep making mistakes"

I asked you befour and i am asking you again to have patience and compassion for victims of domestic violence. It is important to realize women stay with abusers for many reasons. Judging and placing blame on victims only drives them farther into silence. Please remember, leaving an abuser is not a decision, it’s a process. Stick it out, be supportive of your friend, family member or coworker. You may be their Only Hope.”

Remember together we have the power to make a difference...

So spread the word. Don't wait for tomorrow, May someone need you right now 'Spred it now......

Kindly Support My Mission: STOP Domestic Violence

2007-08-17T17:32:00.000+05:30

kindly Support My Mission'

"light and shade that allow one form to blend in with another leaving something to the imagination"

Domestic violence can happen to anyone, regardless of their background, age, gender, religion, sexuality or ethnicity. It happens in all kinds of relationships. However, statistics show the vast majority of domestic violence is carried out by men and experienced by women. Domestic violence is rarely a one-off. It can begin at any stage of the relationship. Incidents generally become more frequent and severe over time. Domestic violence begins because of the abuser's desire for power and control. It continues because the abusers are allowed to get away with it.

Often the reason is precisely that - the cumulative effect of repeated physical and psychological trauma destroys confidence and self-belief. Just Imagine what life would be like if a violent attacker had the key to your front door…and just imagine how powerless you would feel if your partner had threatened not only you but your whole family. The impact of continued abuse in intimate relationships can be devastating. Women escaping these horrific circumstances can often be heard to say, "but he loves me it’s my fault.I keep making mistakes"

I asked you befour and i am asking you again to have patience and compassion for victims of domestic violence. It is important to realize women stay with abusers for many reasons. Judging and placing blame on victims only drives them farther into silence. Please remember, leaving an abuser is not a decision, it’s a process. Stick it out, be supportive of your friend, family member or coworker. You may be their only hope.”

Remember together we have the power to make a difference...

So spread the word. Don't wait for tomorrow, May someone need you right now 'Spred it now. Email this post ot as many people you can.....

Together we have the power to make a difference

2007-08-11T10:55:00.000+05:30

Hello all my blogger friends & Visitors please help me with your powerful hand...

"Alwals remember "Compassion wherever there is suffering Conviction that the compassion is strong enough to eliminate suffering Courage to make this conviction a reality"

As you all know too often domestic violence is a crime that is hidden away, but i am determined to bring it out into the open and tackle its root causes.

So' What is meant by 'domestic violence ?

Well Domestic violence is any incident of threatening behaviour, violence or abuse between adults who are or have been in a relationship together, or between family members, regardless of gender or sexuality.

Whatever form it takes, domestic violence is rarely a one-off incident. More usually it's a pattern of abusive and controlling behaviour through which the abuser seeks power over their victim.

Domestic violence occurs across society, regardless of age, gender, race, sexuality, wealth and geography.

However, that it consists mainly of violence by men against women.

Victims of domestic violence suffer on many levels - health, housing, education - and lose the freedom to live their lives how they want, and without fear. i aim to support victims of domestic violence with the help of your powerful hands.

"Read this small Story of a girl name Margie"

This is a painful one for Shirley and her husband Larry their daughter Margie was brutally murdered by the man who claimed to love her, Margie’s husband. “It’s easy to look back now and see the warning signs,” states Shirley. “But back then our family did not realize that the verbal attacks were escalating into physical assaults until it was too late.

I ask You to have patience and compassion for victims of domestic violence. It is important to realize women stay with abusers for many reasons. Judging and placing blame on victims only drives them farther into silence. Please remember, leaving an abuser is not a decision, it’s a process. Stick it out, be supportive of your friend, family member or coworker. You may be their only hope.”

The power is Yours......

So please spread the word send this post to everyone you know.....

Remember together we have the power to make a difference......

Domestic violence?

2007-08-04T12:37:00.000+05:30

What is domestic violence?

Domestic violence is abuse by a caregiver, a parent, a spouse or an intimate partner. It can take many forms. Here are some types of abuse: Physical abuse is the use of physical force; s exual abuse means any forced sexual activity; emotional abuse includes threats, constant criticism and put-downs. Controlling access to money and controlling activities are other abusive behaviors.

What can I do if my children or I am abused?
First, make sure you and your children are safe. Go to a safe place, such as the home of a friend or a relative or an emergency shelter. Take your children with you. Call the police if you think you can't leave home safely or if you want to bring charges against your abuser.

If possible, take house keys, money and important papers with you. Do not use drugs or alcohol at this time because you need to be alert in a crisis. The staff members at emergency shelters can help you file for a court order of protection.

What are other ways I can get help if I am abused?
Talk to your doctor, who can treat any medical problem, provide support and make referrals. Call an emergency shelter and ask about counseling and support groups for you and your children. Nurses, social workers and other health care professionals can also help you.

“I ask you to have patience and compassion for victims of domestic violence. It is important to realize women stay with abusers for many reasons. Judging and placing blame on victims only drives them farther into silence. Please remember, leaving an abuser is not a decision, it’s a process. Stick it out, be supportive of your friend, family member or coworker. You may be their only hope.”

Think what it's like to live with domestic viole

2007-07-29T09:01:00.000+05:30

Don't mistake delay for denial by life.
Have you've never experienced domestic violence it can be difficult to imagine just what those affected have to go through.

We all know what a bully is...

Just imagine living with a bully all the time, but being too scared to leave.

Just imagine being afraid to go to sleep at night, being afraid to wake up in the morning.

Just imagine being denied food, warmth or sleep. Imagine being punched, slapped, hit, bitten, pinched and kicked.

Just imagine being pushed, shoved, burnt, strangled, raped, beaten.

Just imagine having to watch everything you do or say in case it 'upsets' the person you live with - or else you'll be punished.

Just imagine having to seek permission to go out, to see your friends or your family or to give your children a treat.

Just imagine being a prisoner in your own home - imagine being timed, when you go out to the shops.

Just imagine that you believe what he tells you - that it's your fault. That if only you were a better mother, lover, housekeeper, kept your mouth shut, could only keep the children quiet, dressed how he liked you to, kept in shape, gave up your job - somehow things would get better.

Just imagine that you don't know where to get help, what to do, or how to leave.

Just imagine that you can't face the shame of admitting what's really going on to family or friends.

Just imagine his threats if you dare to say you will leave. How could you ever find the strength to leave? Will you ever be safe again?

Just imagine threats to find and kill you and your children, wherever you go.

Just imagine permanent injuries and sometimes death.

"Well 'I don't think people who have never suffered violence can understand the trauma of being the victim of violent behaviour, nor the difficulties involved in trying to escape from that behaviour."

Often the reason is precisely that - the cumulative effect of repeated physical and psychological trauma destroys confidence and self-belief. Imagine what life would be like if a violent attacker had the key to your front door…and just imagine how powerless you would feel if your partner had threatened not only you but your whole family. The impact of continued abuse in intimate relationships can be devastating. Women escaping these horrific circumstances can often be heard to say, "but he loves me it’s my fault.I keep making mistakes"

Do you know what is domestic violence?

2007-07-23T17:21:00.000+05:30

Well it goese like this...

Domestic violence is a pattern of controlling and aggressive behaviours from one adult, usually a man, towards another, usually a woman, within the context of an intimate relationship.

It can be physical, sexual, psychological or emotional abuse. Financial abuse and social isolation are also common features.

The violence and abuse can be actual or threatened and can happen once every so often or on a regular basis.

It can happen to anyone, and in all kinds of relationships - heterosexual, lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender. People suffer domestic violence regardless of their social group, class, age, race, disability, sexuality or lifestyle. The abuse can begin at any time - in new relationships or after many years spent together.

Children are affected by domestic violence both in the short and the long term.
less frequently still wholly unacceptable, men are abused by their partners, both male and female.

All forms of abuse - psychological, economic, emotional and physical - come from the abuser’s desire for power and control.

A true Story "Call the slow burn"

2007-07-19T08:35:00.000+05:30

"I'd been with Nick for about two years and he had been quite controlling in his attitude towards me, but never violent.
I don't know how this happened. It was probably over something quite trivial, but one time he started punching and kicking me.
I fell onto the floor and he carried on punching and kicking me, up and down my spine.
By the time he was violent, I lost the ability to think independently and logically. His behavior before that had been one of chipping away at my self esteem. I was more aware of how he was feeling than of how I was feeling.
I really believed that I would never escape alive. I had commitment, I loved this man and I always thought I was bigger than this. He would never say, "yes, I behaved badly" or "yes, I am violent."
I started to understand what people call the slow burn, when women murder their partners. I thought if he wasn't here I could escape and I started to fantasize about killing him."
Lesley, UK For more true stories CLICK HERE

It’s my fault.I keep making mistakes: STOP: Domestic Violence.

2007-07-10T13:26:00.001+05:30

I made this Art with a thought that one day Domestic violence will be over...

"A very great vision is needed, and the person who has it must follow it, as the eagle seeks the deepest blue of the sky."
STOP: Domestic Violence AGAINST Women
Every six hours, a young married woman is burned, beaten to death or driven to commit suicide, officials say.

Overall, a crime against women is committed every three minutes in India, according to India's National Crime Records Bureau Read More...

Painful one for Shirley: Domestic Violence.

2007-07-10T12:39:00.000+05:30

Their is always something in my mind that I'm just another human being. As i read this some where:
"Thousands of candles can be lighted from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared."

”This truth is a painful one for Shirley and her husband Larry their daughter Margie was brutally murdered by the man who claimed to love her, Margie’s husband. “It’s easy to look back now and see the warning signs,” states Shirley. “But back then our family did not realize that the verbal attacks were escalating into physical assaults until it was too late.”

“I ask you to have patience and compassion for victims of domestic violence. It is important to realize women stay with abusers for many reasons. Judging and placing blame on victims only drives them farther into silence. Please remember, leaving an abuser is not a decision, it’s a process. Stick it out, be supportive of your friend, family member or coworker. You may be their only hope.”

STOP: Domestic Violence AGAINST Women
Every six hours, a young married woman is burned, beaten to death or driven to commit suicide, officials say.
Overall, a crime against women is committed every three minutes in India, according to India's National Crime Records Bureau Read More...

Their is always Something in the new is happning:

2007-07-10T11:04:00.001+05:30

I made this Beautiful Art Six Years ago. when i was studnt. . .
"Their is always Something in the new is happning in Our life. Anyways."
"It doesn't matter what you've been through, where you come from none of that matters. What matters is how you choose to love, how you choose to express that love through your work, through your family, through what you have to give to the world"

"light and shade that allow one form to blend in with another leaving something to the imagination"

STOP: Domestic Violence AGAINST Women
Every six hours, a young married woman is burned, beaten to death or driven to commit suicide, officials say.

Overall, a crime against women is committed every three minutes in India, according to India's National Crime Records Bureau Read More...

Humans have to make the change,"Art can't

2007-07-10T09:37:00.000+05:30

Their is not much i have to say but their is something i shoud say :
"Humans have to make the change,"Art can't."
"What can be shown, cannot be said." What a picture conveys, cannot be fixed by words. Words are a subjective proxy for a picture, a separate creation with a life of its own.

1. Woman is more fitted than man to make exploration and take bolder action in nonviolence.
2. There is no occasion for women to consider themselves subordinate or inferior to man.
3. Woman is the companion of man, gifted with equal mental capacity.
4. If by strength is meant moral power, then woman is immeasurably man's superior.
5. If nonviolence is the law of our being, the future is with women.
6. Woman, I hold, is the personification of self-sacrifice, but unfortunately today she does not realize what tremendous advantage she has over man.

STOP: Domestic Violence AGAINST Women
Every six hours, a young married woman is burned, beaten to death or driven to commit suicide, officials say.

Overall, a crime against women is committed every three minutes in India, according to India's National Crime Records Bureau Read More...

45% of Indian girls married off before 18.

2007-07-04T13:01:00.000+05:30

It’s a social ill that continues to shame India. Nearly 45% of women in the country, aged between 20 and 24, are married off before they reach 18, the legal age to marry. What’s worse, the number is over 50% in eight states।

Figures show:

1. 61% of women in Jharkhand were married off before 18,
2. 60% in Bihar,
3. 57% in Rajasthan,
4. 55% in Andhra Pradesh,
5. 53% each in Madhya Pradesh, Uttar Pradesh and West Bengal,
6. 52% in Chhattisgarh.

Lack of education was found to be a major factor fuelling this trend. Over 71% of women who got married below the age of 18 had received no education.

These are part of the findings of the latest National Family Health Survey-III, carried out in 29 states during 2005-06.

The survey, conducted by 18 research organisations, including five population research centres, and designed to collect and provide vital information on population, family planning, maternal and child health, child survival, nutrition of children and status of women, also unmasks another worrying trend. Six states — Arunachal Pradesh, Punjab, Mizoram, Sikkim, Tripura and West Bengal — which reported a lower percentage of under-18 marriages among women during the NFHS-II survey conducted in 1998-99, show an upward trend in NFHS-III. Officials say more and more women in these six states are being married off at the age of 15.

The survey, which interviewed 1,24,395 women and reported a response rate of 94.5%, shows that this social malady exists mostly in rural India. While 52.5% of the cases of under-18 marriages were found to be in rural areas, the number stood at 28.1% in urban India.

Some states, however, have shown a low prevalence of this practice. States like Goa, Himachal Pradesh, Manipur, Jammu and Kashmir, Kerala, Punjab, Delhi, Tamil Nadu, Uttarakhand and Meghalaya reported 12%-25% prevalence.

Top Most Powerful Women's Organizations

2007-07-04T00:04:00.000+05:30

1) Catalyst Founded in 1962,

Catalyst is the leading research and advisory organization working with businesses and the professions to build inclusive environments and expand opportunities for women at work.

2) Center for Reproductive Rights Founded in 1992

The Center for Reproductive Rights uses the law to advance reproductive freedom as a fundamental right that all governments are legally obligated to protect, respect and fulfill.

3) Feminist Majority Foundation

The Feminist Majority Foundation works for social, political and economic equality for women by using research and education to improve women's lives.

4) Global Fund for Women

The Global Fund for Women, an international network of women and men committed to a world of equality and social justice, advocates for and defends women's human rights by making grants to support women's groups around the world.

5) Institute for Women's Policy Research

The Institute for Women's Policy Research conducts rigorous research and focuses on issues of poverty and welfare, employment and earnings, work and family issues, health and safety, and women's civic and political participation.

6)NARAL

NARAL Pro-Choice America is committed to advancing our shared values. We are committed to protecting the right to choose and electing candidates who will promote policies to prevent unintended pregnancy.

7) National Women's Political Caucus
The National Women's Political Caucus is a multicultural, intergenerational, and multi-issue grassroots organization dedicated to increasing women’s participation in the political process and creating a true women’s political power base to achieve equality for all women.

8) National Organization for Women (NOW) Founding in 1966

The National Organization for Women (NOW) is the largest organization of feminist activists in the United States. Since its founding in 1966, NOW's goal has been to take action to bring about equality for all women.

9) Third Wave Foundation

The Third Wave Foundation helps support the leadership of young women ages 15 to 30 by providing resources, public education, and relationship building opportunities.

10) YWCA

The YWCA is the oldest and largest multicultural women's organization in the world. Our mission to eliminate racism and empower women. We provide safe places for women and girls, build strong women leaders, and advocate for women's rights and civil rights in Congress.

STOP Domestic Violence U may be their only hope

2007-07-02T18:56:00.000+05:30

"A picture is worth a thousand words,"

“ I am a Jew. Hath not a Jew eyes ? Hath not a Jew hands, organs, dimensions, senses, affections, passions ? hurt with the same weapons, If you prick us, do we not bleed? if you poison us, do we not die? and if you wrong us, shall we not revenge ?.”

It is well documented that women who experience domestic violence can find it difficult to leave a violent relationship. The prospect of asking for help can be daunting for a woman who is feeling isolated, and whose self-esteem has been lowered by abuse. But is it more difficult for a disabled woman in a violent situation to seek help?

“I ask you to have patience and compassion for victims of domestic violence. It is important to realize women stay with abusers for many reasons. Judging and placing blame on victims only drives them farther into silence. Please remember, leaving an abuser is not a decision, it’s a process. Stick it out, be supportive of your friend, family member or coworker. You may be their only hope.”

STOP: Domestic Violence AGAINST Women:
Every six hours, a young married woman is burned, beaten to death or driven to commit suicide, officials say.

Overall, a crime against women is committed every three minutes in India, according to India's National Crime Records Bureau Read More...

Unicef says domestic violence against women

2007-07-02T18:26:00.000+05:30

"Every persom must decide whether he will walk in the creative light of altruism or the darkness of destructive selfishness. This is the judgement. Life's persistent and most urgent question is, 'What are you doing for others?"

United Nations children's agency, Unicef, says domestic violence against women and girls worldwide remains an epidemic, despite international pledges five years ago to reduce the problem.

Unicef says in a report that in some countries, half the female population has suffered physical, sexual or mental abuse.

Sex-selective abortion, killings of baby girls and inferior access to food and medicine mean that there are 60 million fewer women in the world than there should be.

The bulk of that discrepancy occurs in South Asia, North Africa, the Middle East and China, Unicef said.

"Governments should ensure that there is no impunity for the perpetrators of domestic violence and that incidents of family violence are investigated and punished."

“I ask you to have patience and compassion for victims of domestic violence. It is important to realize women stay with abusers for many reasons. Judging and placing blame on victims only drives them farther into silence. Please remember, leaving an abuser is not a decision, it’s a process. Stick it out, be supportive of your friend, family member or coworker. You may be their only hope.”

STOP: Domestic Violence AGAINST Women:
Every six hours, a young married woman is burned, beaten to death or driven to commit suicide, officials say.

Overall, a crime against women is committed every three minutes in India, according to India's National Crime Records Bureau Read More...

STOP: Domestic Violence AGAINST Women In India

2007-07-02T17:23:00.000+05:30

A landmark new law seeking to protect women from domestic violence has come into effect in India.

The law also bans harassment by way of dowry demands and gives sweeping powers to a magistrate to issue protection orders where needed.

Punishment could range from a jail term of up to one year and/or a fine of up to 20,000 rupees ($450).

Every six hours, a young married woman is burned, beaten to death or driven to commit suicide, officials say.

Overall, a crime against women is committed every three minutes in India, according to India's National Crime Records Bureau.

Despite the scale of the problem, there had been no specific legislation to deal with actual abuse or the threat of abuse at home.

Domestic violence, under the new law, includes "actual abuse or the threat of abuse whether physical, sexual, emotional or economic," a statement from the federal ministry of women and child development said.

Wall of silence :

The law provides protection to the wife or live-in partner from violence at the hands of the husband or live-in partner or his relatives.

INDIA: CRIME AGAINST WOMEN
1.One crime against women every 3 minutes
2.One rape every 29 minutes
3.One dowry death case every 77 minutes
4.One case of cruelty by husband and relatives every 9 minutes
Source: National Crime Records Bureau

Besides physical violence, the law also covers forcing a wife or partner to look at pornography.

"We have been trying for long to protect women from domestic violence. In India alone, around 70% of women are victim of these violent acts in one or the other form," junior minister for women and child development Renuka Chowdhury told the Press Trust of India news agency.

Women's activists have welcomed the law, although many say it is not perfect.

They say a bill alone will not help in preventing domestic abuse; what is needed is a change in mind sets.

A survey by the International Institute for Population Studies showed 56% of Indian women believed wife beating to be justified in certain circumstances.

The reasons varied from going out without the husband's permission to cooking a bad meal.

Domestic abuse is often denied by the victims themselves.

In figures:

1. Bangalore has witnessed hundred cases of dowry-related complaints. Some were freshly bruised, others have been starved for days and some fear that their husbands or in-laws will burn or strangle them to death.

2. According to the National Family Health Survey, one in five married women in India experiences domestic violence from the age of 15.

3. A nationwide survey shows that 52 per cent of women suffer at least one incident of physical or psychological violence in their lifetime.

4. Every six hours, a young married woman is burned alive, beaten to death, or driven to commit suicide.

5. It is estimated that more than 15,000 women suffer from dowry-related violence ever year.
6. Rajasthan ranks sixth in the country in the arena of atrocities against women.

7. Kerala, the most literate state too is high on the graph of women abuse.

8. Independent women too are victims of domestic violence lately the case of Shweta Mahajan, a pilot married to Rahul Mahajan has come to the fore.

9. Of the women reporting violence, 50 percent were kicked, beaten or hit when pregnant. About 74.8 percent of the women who reported violence have attempted to commit suicide.

10. According to UN, two third married Indian women are victims of domestic violence.

"Compassion wherever there is suffering
Conviction that the compassion is strong enough to eliminate suffering
Courage to make this conviction a reality"

I remember just like its Yesterday.

2007-07-02T17:08:00.000+05:30

As i drawn this Beautiful art work 2 years back.

I remember just like its Yesterday.

"Opposite a true statement is a false statement, but opposite a profound truth is another profound truth." The Persian poet Rumi wrote, "Out beyond ideas of wrong-doing and right-doing, there is a field. I'll meet you there."

STOP: Domestic Violence AGAINST Women

Every six hours, a young married woman is burned, beaten to death or driven to commit suicide, officials say.

Overall, a crime against women is committed every three minutes in India, according to India's National Crime Records Bureau Read More...

O'Yes i remember, i read this some were. . .

2007-07-02T16:23:00.000+05:30

When i was making this Lovely art work what is that i was thinking.
O'Yes i remember, i read this some were. . .
"Think of the experience as a battery. You'll never charge up a dead battery if you don't have the cable attached to BOTH poles. It takes the right brain and left brain to give birth to a thought. The sperm and the egg to conceive a child. NEW LIFE, new thought, new creations come from the union of opposites"

STOP: Domestic Violence AGAINST Women:

Every six hours, a young married woman is burned, beaten to death or driven to commit suicide, officials say.
Overall, a crime against women is committed every three minutes in India, according to India's National Crime Records Bureau Read More...